Sunday, November 29, 2009

Giving Thanks

Thanksgiving has come and gone. hmmm...Now we are focusing on Christmas. With the help of my husband and daughter we were able to hold a "normal" Thanksgiving feast; just the three of us. This is the smallest group that I have ever had to cook for and now that it is over I think that it was one of the best. It was physically draining but fortunately I could rest with the help. The day before was actually harder than the day of. I was really missing my whole family being together. This is our first holiday without the five of us together. I was emotional and felt lost the days leading up to Thanksgiving and actually had a bit of a breakdown in the supermarket while trying to put together in my head the things that I needed to buy. There was a moment when my fever, muscle cramps, headache, body weakness, and brain fog was just more than I could handle. I was sitting on the rolling ladder that I found in the organic aisle sweating bullets and crying my eyes out. I couldn't remember the sweet potatoes, green beans, cranberry sauce, whipped cream... I wasn't sure if I already had these things in my cart or if I still needed to find them. The grocery store suddenly became this vast field of canned goods and dairy products. I truly didn't know where or what to do. I froze and lost myself for a bit. Before I knew what I was doing I had dialed my husband at work. I have never called him in such disrepair and I think I scared the life out of him. The next thing I knew I was sitting in the pharmacy and I looked up to see him coming through the automatic doors of the supermarket. He saved me and for this I am thankful. What an experience because I have always been so tough and this felt like such a weakness.
As for my health I received news from my doctor on the 19th that my TSH level while on .175 mcg of Levothyroxine still measured a 55.5 uIU/mL when the normal range should be between 0.40-4.6 uIU/mL. Basically, my thyroid has shut down. This was actually good news to me because it explained the coma type tiredness that I have been going in and out of for quite some time. Tomorrow I am making an appointment with an Endocrinologist to follow up. After my horrible reaction to Macrobid (that too is now listed on my long list of medicine allergies). After having an Cystoscopy the Urologist placed me on a permanent regimen of antibiotics. I am now taking Keflex and am having the usual side-effects that go with taking antibiotics. I can't decide if the chronic bladder infection is better than the chronic yeast infections added onto the bladder infections. All this to try and keep the infection from causing damage to my kidneys.
Well, the hope is that the Endocrinologist will be able to diagnose if the chronic infections is the cause of my chronic fevers or if the thyroid dysfunction has caused my system to not be able to maintain/regulate my body temperature.
We are hopeful that we will get some answers with the next specialist and in the meantime we are taking it one day at a time; one good and one bad day at a time.

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