Friday, September 2, 2011
Just a Little Lupie
Almost a year has gone by and here I sit - wondering what great things I can write to you all. The first thing that comes to mind is thank you "Lois" for opening my eyes to the importance of writing this blog. I realized just how important it is to you (the follower) as it is to me. When I first started this blog, I was angry and scared. A few years later, I am still the same. It makes me angry that there haven't been any changes with my health other than more illness. It makes me sad that I can't give you all any magic words that can make me or you miraculously better. I sit here dumbfounded as what to write. However, I WILL write! When I was first diagnosed, I was much more scared than I am today and that is something to share. Receiving a diagnosis is just that...a diagnosis. It isn't the end of the world but an obstacle that we can learn to maneuver around, coexist with, handle it, cry about it, get angry about it, and just get over it! They say that there are many levels to grief and I feel as though I am stuck in the angry chapter. So angry that I couldn't write for so long because I didn't have anything constructive to share. I think that those of us that are dealing with loss (of any kind) can truly get what I am saying/feeling. Now, how do I get out of this phase? Now that I have shared with you all where I am on this journey, I will do my best to bring you up to date. I am sorry "Rose" that I did not respond to your post from so long ago. I intend to get my act together and get back to you on your question. I have too many things rattling around in my head as I type this post. I will have more constructive things to share with you once I get a handle on all of these thoughts, feelings, and ideas. For now I am feeling just a little Lupie!